Scattered thoughts

Thoughts on Crazy love by Francis Chan

What is heaven to you? Is it merely an alternative to hell? What if I asked you, if you could have a heaven, a heaven with no sickness or death. A heaven where all your friends were, along with everything you've ever enjoyed on earth, all the food and music and earthly wonders. If you could have that heaven, even if Christ was not there, would you? Christians seem only to think about whether what they are doing is what God wants or not if they think it will affect their salvation. You may ask yourself questions that go along the lines of, "If I do this, can I still get into heaven"? If that is true, then your entire view on what God intends for His children is wrong.

Repeatedly in the Bible, God asks for everything. All of it. What is considered "radical Christianity" is exactly what Jesus Himself asked of His disciples. Go out into the world, making disciples of all nations! Not, go to church every Saturday or Sunday, know some Bible verses, and don't have sex before marriage. How is that furthering the cause of Christ? Look at the parable of the sower in Mark chapter 4. Ask yourself, what was His message in this parable? It appears to me as if He is saying, "to be a good seed, a true follower of Me, you must bear fruit." Chan says that he doesn't think that those who don't bear fruit will make it to heaven. Not that God can't cover a multitude of sins. He can and does. But don't assume you are the good seed.

Say someone asks you if you would choose God over everything you own. I know most of us want to say that we'd pick God, without hesitation. But would you? Would you really? And even if you did, would it be grudgingly?

Are you content to live a lukewarm life, despite the fact that God says that lukewarm living disgusts Him? Is it satisfying for you to not have to trust God, because you have your bank account, or your 5-year plan? Or is now the time to finally understand what God, the one and only perfect Being, is the God who loves you and not only wants what is best for you, but is able to give it to you? Humans are no where near perfect. We are selfish, controlling, and stupid. But He promises that with Him, nothing is impossible. Did you catch that? Nothing. The lost ones are found, the broken ones are restored, the ones consumed by sadness can trade it for joy! Being in love with God and following Him in every second of your life isn't just for radical Christians. It isn't just for those who think that it isn't impossible. It's for you. He's standing right there next to you, waiting to take you and your lukewarm life and transform them into the gloriousness He has planned. And you can accept. All you have to do is ask.

Holy Spirit

Warmth. Everyone has a way to describe the feeling- tingly, warm fuzzies, like every sense is awakened. For once, the outside is numb, while something- warmth- pours over every inside you have. Impossible things happen. Things that were embedded in you, that have made you squirm with guilt and doom, are puffs of air, completely separated from your soul. Silent fire washes you clean, a fire that instead of leaving ashes, takes them all away. All that is left is that singular warmth. Moving, floating, and then taking who you were and changing it into who you will become.

My Cornerstone

It's not a bad thing to trust other people, to trust yourself. Self-confidence isn't bad to some extent, but the term "I can do anything I put my mind to" is missing something. Society forgets that something when they send out that message: You and I are only human. If your faith and trust are in yourself or another person, and you are OK with that, ponder this- What are you going to do when the 'unbreakable' breaks? When your high ground is flooded in tears? What will you do when you or that person can't bear it anymore, when in some way or another they have to just let things slip and fall, and you find yourself with broken bones and bleeding?

I mean to break your illusion of safety. I can't imagine going back to living like that, after spending so much time being strong for no one other than myself. I've now let all the boulders I'd been holding up slide, and instead of crashing down and crushing me, I've finally let Someone catch them. No more oppression, of having to go and pick the all back up again, only to have it all return to my shoulders. Not only has the pile of rocks been lifted completely, all the dirt left over from countless times of falling has been washed clean. I can live with the knowledge that the path ahead of me has many rocks that will fall onto my pile, but none will ever have the ability to crush me.

Anyone and everyone's life can be like this. All you have to know is where, and Who, to place your trust in.

The End.

What will flash through my mind when my eyes meet those of my Creators? I can't help but wonder if all will be wiped away, save the love for the One who gave me life with His breath... A wordless, overflowing passion that is stronger than anything I've ever felt!

Or, perhaps, instead of my heart soaring, it will crash to the ground and shatter. Every evil deed I'd ever done rushing into my memory, the guilt smashing down around me, drowning me. Nothing to do but sob and sob as the full realization of my crimes fill me with despair.

Probably both. But I can only see one ending- me, in the arms of Jesus. Me. One of billions and billions, maybe even trillions who have been created and placed on this earth, loved indescribably. Given a name that the Lord, Most High God, gave me- His child. Loved and at peace, finally and for eternity.

What a great and almighty God we serve!

Church

"The blood of the martyr is the seed of the Christian Church"

Perhaps the problem with Christianity today is that it's to easy. There is no great public struggle. Sure, we are told to hold to our morals, but there are plenty of non-churched people who don't steal or curse or have sex out of marriage. Many teens and adults have made the decision not to smoke, do drugs, or drink. Many so-called Christians abandon these values that they claim to uplift and commit all of these crimes.

There is no passion to study the Bible and discover how God asks us to live. No fire in our bellies to bring others to the Truth. The need for others to experience what we have in God is so low because our own experience with Him has not reached even close to its full potential. The overwhelming desire to share the peace and completeness of Christ is so rarely felt because we ourselves are rarely peaceful or complete! Because of this, we ignore our very purpose on earth. "You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body." (1 Cor. 6:19b-20) We are supposed to be dedicated to God, wholly and daily.

Early Roman Christians displayed their willingness to die for the same Christ we have. Every single day, because of the faith they had, their lives were on the line. And people noticed. Being a follower of Christ was hard, so when Christians kept going, those who were watching them decided that if He was worth dying for, He must be worth living for. Life may have been harder, but it made all the more difference.

Back then, accepting Christ meant you knew your life was going to change. It wasn't necessarily easier, but they took it on anyway. Everyone, yes, everyone was allowed to join, and many took the opportunity. The attitude wasn't, "Let's show off how good we are", or, "How can the church benefit". It was, "How many people can we love and bring to Christ". Church wasn't a once-a-week thing. It was a culture. Living in that culture meant risking your life, but it was so much more like God intended it to be.

What comes out of nothing-

So many topics swirl in my mind... But I feel no inspiration from any of them. I'm not the type of writer who writes on topics like assignments. If an idea presents itself, I ponder it until I have developed a good enough idea of it to begin writing furiously, afraid to lose words. The feeling of words rushing out of me is incredible, however at the moment my words seem to be uneccesary. They have no point, other than to take up space on a page....

Isn't life like this sometimes? We are told to live every day to its fullest, be the best we can be, but it seems impossible to do that on a daily basis. Life just kind of goes along, whether we are up for the challenge or not. I don't think I've accomlished anything memorable today, even this blog took me a good two hours to get up the energy to write. Some days simply take up space. Would the world be a better place if we didn't live like that? I think so. Think, if every person on this website wrote an amazing, view-changing blog everyday. How wise would the readers be? I know I'd enjoy it.

From a cliche perspective: If everyone woke up each morning (afternoon? lol) with a purpose in mind, a task to accomplish, doesn't have to be anything big, how much different would each day be? Lying down at night, thinking, "I've done what I set out to do". To stop getting up and living just because you don't have many other choices, to not have to write just fill up a blank page...

I love it already :)

Shame :'(

"If we could read the secret history of our enemies,
we should find in each man's life
sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility."
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

My Labor Day weekend has been quite amazing. I've been able to spend time with many of the people I hold dearest, done some crazy things, and made a few memories. However, what had stood out to me most of all is not the fun or the partying, but the realization of something I thought I knew...

Many people believe, though the world is filled with self-centered human beings, that they are not one of them. I myself look in the mirror and see a girl who cares immensly about others. In fact, I pride myself in my respect for my fellow man and my protectiveness of my friends.
Even so, these past couple of days, especially this one, have somewhat cracked that mirror of self righteousness.

Someone I had talked badly about to my friends, someone I thought was one of the afor mentioned 'self centered' human beings, someone I had even wished evil apon, opened up to me, and I was crushed inside. I sit here now thinking how twisted I was without even realizing it. I had begun to view this beautiful person as someone who only loved themselves, instead of a person who was loved by Someone much greater than myself. I don't even know how to beg for forgiveness, even though I know it is freely given, at least from the Someone who loves above all.

It only took a second for this child to open up to me and tell me what was wrong, to show me that I was trusted. Only a second to pound into my soul that lesson I had decieved myself into thinking I knew by heart. All pain is real pain, and it should be wished upon no one. This being didn't deserve my cruelty, and I am utterly ashamed.

Isaiah 64:6 says, "But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away". In that moment I felt myself being blown away in the wind, completely insignificant. What I had prided myself in all my life seemed so small compared to my failure to remember that every beating heart on this earth is loved beyond all imagination.

My lesson in all this: you DON'T know what anyone else is going through. I have yet to meet a single human being who didn't wear some sort of mask, great or small. All my dark thoughts were forgotten when I felt this person's pain. Sorrow and suffering spares no one, it is another one of those things that connects us all... that, and the fact that we are loved.